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OK Fatties, no fuel for you!
Posted by: McQ on Friday, May 16, 2008

In case you missed it, a new cause of global warming has been found according to Reuters:
Obesity contributes to global warming, too.

Obese and overweight people require more fuel to transport them and the food they eat, and the problem will worsen as the population literally swells in size, a team at the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine says.

This adds to food shortages and higher energy prices, the school's researchers Phil Edwards and Ian Roberts wrote in the journal Lancet on Friday.
We have a responsibility for heaven sake:
"We are all becoming heavier and it is a global responsibility," Edwards said in a telephone interview. "Obesity is a key part of the big picture."
And what is the knee-jerk propensity in this day and age to exercise our 'global responsibilit[ies]"? Well, all one has to do is review how we've handled the so-called threat of AGW to figure it out.

Here's a hint:
At least 400 million adults worldwide are obese. The World Health Organization (WHO) projects by 2015, 2.3 billion adults will be overweight and more than 700 million will be obese.

In their model, the researchers pegged 40 percent of the global population as obese with a body mass index of near 30. Many nations are fast approaching or have surpassed this level, Edwards said.

BMI is a calculation of height to weight, and the normal range is usually considered to be 18 to 25, with more than 25 considered overweight and above 30 obese.

The researchers found that obese people require 1,680 daily calories to sustain normal energy and another 1,280 calories to maintain daily activities, 18 percent more than someone with a stable BMI.
You're in line to fly. An alert TSI person spots you and pulls you into the newly formed fatty line. With their freshly printed BMI calculations and a scale, the highly trained TSI employess determine you're obese. As you're passed through the line you're handed a slip with the BMI calculation which you are then required to present at a desk. There you pay a fat surtax before being allowed to continue your trip.

Of course it won't be called profiling, a gross indignity, a violation of rights or discriminatory because earth will be being served and we all know that there is no real indignity in serving her first, is there?
"Promotion of a normal distribution of BMI would reduce the global demand for, and thus the price of, food," Edwards and Roberts wrote.
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Previous Comments to this Post 

But all the food us "fatties" eat creates jobs and pumps monies into the economy!


But in all seriousness if they’re worried about food prices they can always stop using foodstuff to create biofuels...
Written By: shark
URL: http://
I think I can make it if only-ala carbon trade-offs-I can find someone in Zimbabwe to trade off.
Written By: tom scott
URL: http://
I’m 6’3".

When do the mandatory amputations kick in?
Written By: jpm100
URL: http://
I’m starting to think we’re a bit late with the armed up-rising...
Written By: Scott Jacobs
URL: http://
So fit people contribute as well since they have high metabolic rates and thus consume more food than the average person. So don’t be fat, don’t be fit, just sort of be a lump.

Yet another sign the academy is off its rails.

Written By: Grimshaw
URL: http://
Boycott Oliver Willis, save the environment. Win-win
Written By: Aldo
URL: http://
Doesn’t this diverge with the "each according to their abilities .. each according to their needs" meme ?
Written By: Neo
URL: http://
end farm subs = market priced food = decreased demand in america = more food to export = less food eaten in america = less fatties
Written By: josh b
URL: http://
I protest this incitement of violence toward Michael Moore. It’s a Rethuglican plot. Women and minorities hardest hit.

Besides, BMI is a poor metric. I propose we check percentage of body fat. They are already hooked to the electrodes at that point, so we just up the current for the real fatties. Slightly too high, the shock is a warning. Gross obesity? Death by electrocution.

I have a counterproposal. A bounty on interfering jerks who can’t even run their own lives. Fifty bucks for a TSA agent, because they are easy to find. A hundred for CPS or IRS agents, because you have to bait them.
Written By: MarkD
URL: http://
Al Gore revealed today that the need to declare Global Warming "settled science’ and end the debate is because the excess CO2 generated during such a debate would add to the the Global Warming problem. He droned on and on about this for hours.
Written By: Neo
URL: http://
Slightly too high, the shock is a warning. Gross obesity? Death by electrocution.
Yeah, but if they catch fire, you’ll never put it out...
Written By: Scott Jacobs
URL: http://
Gives a whole new meaning to the concept of the Soup Nazi.

"No soup for you!"
Written By: Martin McPhillips
end farm subs = market priced food = decreased demand in america = more food to export = less food eaten in america = less fatties
Like it or not, the subsidy policy is designed to keep an overcapacity of farming so that in years of low yields from drought, disease or whatever, production can quickly react.

If you think gas prices are inelastic, let a few years of surplus yields kill the farm industry down to smaller group, then face a few years of deficit yields.
Written By: jpm100
URL: http://
Like it or not, the subsidy policy is designed to keep an overcapacity of farming so that in years of low yields from drought, disease or whatever, production can quickly react.
This assumes that farmers are too stupid to opt to NOT plant full fields in prices are rock bottom.
Written By: Scott Jacobs
URL: http://
BMI is a crock - I’m 6 foot, 217 pounds which puts me in the 30+ range of BMI. But I have a 34 waste, can bench 250, and run a mile in just over 6 minutes.
Written By: meagain
URL: http://
Just think of the polar bears before you eat that next Snickers bar.

(Or we’ll be back with a court order issued under the Endangered Species Act to feed you to the damned bears!)
Written By: Terry
URL: http://
Or, in a slightly more antiquated form:

"Don’t fight it, dear. Just lay back and think of the Arctic."
Written By: Terry
URL: http://
They can have my pork chop when they pry it from my cold, dead, pudgy hands!
Written By: timactual
URL: http://
"They can have my pork chop..."

That also goes for my burgers, fries, Philly cheese steaks, Hershey bars, etc., and my adult beverages.
Written By: timactual
URL: http://

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