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If I were plotting to destroy the Democratic Party...
Posted by: Billy Hollis on Friday, January 16, 2009

Here's a plan that I think might work:

  1. Get a squishy, non-conservative Republican president elected who is so inarticulate and goofy sounding that just about anyone looks good by comparison.
  2. Get the ditziest woman I could find, and put her in charge of Democrats in the House of Representatives. Have the power go to her head, and make sure a compliant media never points out how incompetent she is.
  3. Get the drabbest man I could find, and put him in charge of Democrats in the Senate. Make sure his self-importance is pumped up to the point that he thinks he can flout the law to spite people he doesn't like.
  4. Get a bunch of Republicans to do stupid, corrupt things, and get the media to make it out as a crisis of biblical proportions, thereby getting the Democrats in control of Congress, and making the ditzy woman and the drab man national leaders.
  5. Get the Democrats to nominate a black man with no qualifications or experience for President, and again get the compliant media to grease his way into office.
  6. Get the Republicans to nominate a cranky old fart who pisses off the Republican base, thereby further ensuring that the Democratic candidate wins.
  7. Set things up so that the handover to total Democratic control coincides with a major economic downturn and threatened financial meltdown that was mostly precipitated by government mismanagement in the first place.
  8. At the same time, expose at least a half dozen instances of corruption on the part of Democrats. Preferably at least one of these should be a foul-mouthed idiot. Others should be intimately connected to the aforementioned economic/financial problems. It would help if some of the scandal-plagued Democrats are obviously incompetent at the very things they're supposed to be providing leadership on, such as the tax code. Make sure the new president is involved in some of the scandals, and it would be even better if he precipitated some more scandals with foolish cabinet choices.
  9. Sit back and watch the incompetent and corrupt Democrats completely screw up the handling of their total control. For example, have their ditzy Speaker of the House start doing backroom deals that involve hundreds of billions of dollars. Let them get as many common voters as possible mad at them by sucking up to unions, leftist pro-regulation types, and public employees who have far more generous pensions that those common voters.
  10. Kill off the newspapers that ran interference for the Democrats, and arrange for media to move to an era where everything that happens is spilled right out where the public can see it.
  11. Nominate some Republican candidates with brains and principles, and get them elected because the public is completely soured on foolish and incompetent Democrats. Return to free-market sanity. Put a simplified tax system in place to save tons of money and stop distorting incentives. Cut federal spending by at least 20%. Watch as the 1980s get re-run, except better.
  12. Watch the special interest groups in the Democratic Party tear each other apart fighting over the scraps of federal spending still left for agenda-driven spending.

I know this plan sounds preposterous, with a lot of very long-shot tasks. But I honestly think it could happen. Though I have to admit that the next-to-last step looks like the hardest.
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Previous Comments to this Post 

Agree with the next to last statement — Going to be near impossible. The rest looks good. How do we do it?
Written By: bill-tb
URL: http://
Karl Rove you magnificent bastard.
Written By: hpb
Yeah right, Billy. Like any of that would ever happen. The rest us prefer to live in reality thankyouverymuch.
Written By: MichaelW
you forgot (14) and none of that really matters because the looters now outnumber the producers in society.

I see scant hope of ever returning to anything resembling personal and economic freedom barring an armed insurrection.
Written By: kyleN
My what a cunning plan, Baldric! Let the Dems run wild for 20 maybe 30 years at most, then you have em RIGHT where you want em!
Written By: TomD
URL: http://
That’s a good plan.
Though I would like to add a few items to your list,

1) Get a squishy, non-conservative Republican president elected who is so inarticulate and goofy sounding that just about anyone looks good by comparison and employ radio talk show hosts, newspaper columnists, and bloggers to defend him until its too late.

6) Get the Republicans to nominate a cranky old fart who p!sses off the Republican base and give him a VP candidate that provides endless fodder for late-night comedians., thereby further ensuring that the Democratic candidate wins

Then that would be perfect.


(copying and pasting from the original post including the word "p!ssing" won’t fly past the censor until one alters the word "p!ssing".)
Written By: PogueMahone
URL: http://
I laughed at #11. I was thinking, "Which Republicans are those?"

Then I read the last paragraph. The biggest problem with the plan are the current Republicans. So yes, it is a long shot.

Written By: tkc
URL: http://
It won’t work. Turns out, Obama is backtracking on all of his campaign promises. If President Obama doesn’t do anything he said he was going to do, and instead listens to smart people who know what they are talking about (because he himself is dumb and has no answers), we might actually pull through this, and Obama will get all of the credit.

It might not be so bad, because the only way he can succeed is if he governs as a somewhat fiscal conservative with free-market principles. Its possible he might do this, and if so, people will forget about the code pinkos and daily kos crowd calling for european socialism.
Written By: Jimmy the Dhimmi
URL: http://
Good plan, Billy, It is already driving the leftie commenters here nuts :)
Written By: capt joe
URL: http://
It won’t work. The MSM will continue to run interference for Obama and the vast majority of the population takes the MSM at face value. Bush will remain a scape goat for years to come—even as leftist policies begin to exact negative consequences on the economy and personal liberties. By the time cap and trade, astronomical stimulus/pork plans and various PC-motivated personal infringements are noticed, it will be too late.

The leftists have been mewling about loss of freedom for 8 years, but have yet to name a single freedom lost. Not ONE example. Yet we stand on the precipice of having every single aspect of our lives monitored, taxed, abolished, tracked and admonished. Hamburger? Not healthy, too much fat. Cigarette? Nope, we don’t abide THIRD hand smoke. Guns? EEeeeewww, you’re too dumb to protect yourself. And don’t you dare deny Global Warming just because the world is freezing, because you aren’t nuanced enough to know global cooling is caused global warming which is caused by man made CO2—so hold your breath and shut up.

And guess what? With the help of equally elitist and cowardly Republicans, your complaints directed to the likes of Pelosi and Reid will be dismissed as the complaints of imbeciles educated by the public school system and cheap community colleges.
Written By: Dion
URL: http://
this plan sounds preposterous ...
Nominate some Republican candidates with brains and principles ...
I agree .. this sounds preposterous.

The only saving grace the Republicans have is that the party in power, almost always, fragments into fiefdoms.
It happened in the 40 years of Democrats up to 1994, the Republicans 95-06, and already, in 2 years, the Democrats have "assumed the position."

This makes it almost impossible to stay on message.
Written By: Neo
URL: http://
1) Get a squishy, non-conservative Republican president elected who is so inarticulate and goofy sounding that just about anyone looks good by comparison and employ radio talk show hosts, newspaper columnists, and bloggers to defend him until its too late.
Air America was what, again?
Written By: Bithead
And our alternative to was who, again? Al Bore and John "Frenchy" Kerry?
Written By: SDN
URL: http://
If I were plotting to destroy the Democratic Party...
1. I’d catch the Democrat slick git President screwing an intern in the Oval Office then lying about it, be facing prosecution for lying under oath and have the election to the backdrop of a tech stock bubble burst & an offshore (Asian) financial crisis.

2. I’d then institute "Step 11" of Billy’s post.
Written By: unaha-closp
Yeah, it’s not as if Obama can create a depression, reign over it for years on end, get us into bloody and protracted foreign wars, commission the most horrible WMDs ever built, then be remembered as a great hero afterward.
Written By: Effeminem
How to destroy the Republican Party.... look at the last 16 years for playbook.
Written By: CaptinSarcastic
URL: http://

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